Card Sense (or how to finish a marathon)

How many mistakes are made in a bridge session at your favourite club?

Let's do the maths:

• Let's say one mistake for each player on each board (in the bidding, defence or declarer play, mistake meaning any inferior choice or a real blunder), which makes 4 errors par board.
• We multiply by 15 boards (for 15 tables) and we arrive at 60 mistakes per board, then you must multiply that figure by 2 (2 boards per round) and you obtain 120 mistakes per round.
• You then multiply that number by 13 (13 rounds) and you arrive at... 1,560 mistakes per session.

You think I am exaggerating? I don't think so.

The number of mistakes is probably even higher, closer to 2 errors for each player on each board, which makes (brace yourself) 3,120 mistakes per session at your local bridge club, roughly 1,000 mistakes per hour !!!

We are closer to the truth. Why all those mistakes ?

The main reason, I think, is that the immense majority of players are sleeping at the table. They hold their cards, they hear the bidding, they see dummy, but they don't listen, they don't look, they don't think.

Why is that ? I don't know. Probably they don't believe they can control what is happening at the table. I would say at least 8 or 9 players out of 10 think that way.

Basically, those 9 players out of 10 believe bridge is pure luck and that they can't do anything about it.

They don't believe they can count the hands. They don't believe they can know, for sure, the exact distribution of declarer or a defender.

And you see that in the way they play: they hesitate, choose a card, put it back, pick another one, go back to the first one, then throw it on the table, quickly, curious to see what is going to happen, like they have absolutely no idea of what can possibly happen.

The cards falling on the table are for them a constant surprise. For them, bridge happens all the time in the dark and the players who enjoy repeated successes are magicians who access a superior world they will never see.

Those 9 players out of 10 will tell you that the successful player has a "card sense", that he was born with that sense, and that his first words, when he was born, were probably: "I open 1NT and I will make 8 tricks on a club/heart squeeze against West".

Or they will say that player is lucky, which means they are not, obviously.

Let's make an analogy: can we say a marathon runner has a "marathon sense"? And if he finishes the race, will we say he was lucky?

If we accept that a bridge player can have a "card sense", then we have to accept also that a marathon runner who finishes the race has a "marathon sense", or he is lucky, obviously!! That reasoning is evidently totally absurd.

How can a marathon runner run 40 km? He trains for months, if not years. And you think you can play bridge without training? 9 players out of 10 think they can.



West opened 2♠, North passed and East also, 1st big mistake, that we see everyday in every bridge clubs all over the world.

All those players pass, even if they have every reason to bid: they have a fit, only 1 heart (opponents have at least an 8-card heart fit and probably a game; so they have to try and make life difficult for them) and only 7 losers.

After passing, if opponents reopen the bidding, they will now, of course, raise their partner, but it is too late. You have told them time after time to raise immediately, to rob opponents of space, they will never do it.

In 4th seat, you reopen with 2nt, instead of doubling, to protect KJ of spades. Your partner transfers with 3♦, doubled. You decide to jump to 4 ♥ (you also can make mistakes :) ) and everybody passes.

If you look at the hand, 4 ♥has no chance... but...

West leads the J of diamonds, his 1st mistake. This lead shows generally shortness, but these players play that a small card promises an honour. For them, the J is obviously not an honour.

You play small in dummy, East ducks (his 2nd big mistake), and you duck also, to cut communications.

East, if he listened, knows his partner has opened 2♠, he knows his partner has 6 spades, he knows declarer has 2 spades. He knows he has to try to win the diamond in order to play back a spade, but he ducks. WHY ? Mystery.

I can't explain and, if you ask East why, he won't be able to explain either. And if you take the time to explain all that to him, he won't put into practice what you told him. WHY ? Mystery again.

West continues diamonds (2nd mistake by West), instead of switching to a club maybe.

You win and play a heart to the King, picking up East's Queen.

So West has 6 spades, 3 hearts and 2 or 3 diamonds. East has to know you have 2 spades, 4 hearts, and that his partner has 6 spades and 3 hearts.

How did declarer discover all those informations? With his "card sense"? And if East has not discovered the same things, is it because he doesn't have a "card sense"?

You pull all the trumps and play a diamond, ruffing in dummy.

West follows! Thus he had 6 spades, 3 hearts, 3 diamonds and only 1 club.

East also is supposed to know the same things you know: your hand is 2434 and West is 6331.

You know you are going down. You can't avoid losing 1 or 2 spades, 1 or 2 clubs, added to the diamond already conceded. You can maybe save a trick by endplaying West with his singleton club. In hand, he will concede a spade or give you ruff and sluff.

So you play a club from dummy, East plays the 5. 3rd BIG mistake : he knows, if he is not sleeping, that you have 4 clubs; he has only to play the 10. You play the 7, which wins!

The rest is easy : club to the king, small spade towards your Jack. West wins, cashes the Ace and play back a spade, giving you ruff and sluff : +620.

Let's add : West has made 2 mistakes and East, 3 big errors. So 5 mistakes between them on one board: let's multiply by 26 boards and we arrive at 130 mistakes for this pair on one session.

Let's multiply then by 30 pairs, 15 tables, and we arrive at almost 4,000 mistakes in one bridge session.

Astounding, no?

And you thought I was exaggerating at the beginning of this article.

What is even more astounding is that those players play 2, 3, 5, 6, 7 times a week and they never ask themselves why they generally play 45%, and why, one day, they score 60% and, the day after, they go back to 35%.

Why don't they ask themselves those questions: that is the real question, it seems to me.

The trouble with beginners

I think you can double. Opener passes, partner bids 3♦, you rebid 3♥, opener passes, partner passes and responder continues with 3♠. All pass.

Partner leads club 8. As you have bid hearts and she leads a club, this looks like a singleton. As they say: if it looks like a singleton, if it smells like a singleton, if it behaves like a singleton, IT IS a singleton.



Not a very good 3♠, you mumble to yourself: 4333, 10 losers. If opener has AKQxx in spades, you can maybe beat the hand by one trick: 1 club, 1 diamond, 1 heart and 2 ruffs.

So you win with the Ace and play back your smallest club, the 2, suit preference for diamonds. Partner duly ruffs and plays back... a heart. Didn't you tell her over and over that when she ruffs, the card played by her partner tells her which suit to come back? Why does she do that to me, you say? Opener looks at you with a little grin (not really, you're on BBO :) ) and calls for a small heart.

Which card do you play? You are the expert, you have to keep your cool. With the lead and your suit preference, you could have beaten the hand if partner had played back a diamond. Now that defense is dead. You will make only 4 tricks unless... partner can come in again. Can partner really come in hand again? In order to beat that hand, you have to ASSUME that she will get in hand one more time. If not, you will not beat the hand. And the only card she can have to win a trick is the Ace of spades. That means you can beat the hand by 2 tricks: 1 club, 1 heart, 1 diamond, 2 ruffs and the Ace of spades! Wow.

So which heart do you play? All experts know that in 3rd seat, you force with the lowest of touching cards. With KQ, you have to play the Queen; partner can then think you maybe have the King (declarer can false card). But if you play the King, you absolutely deny the Queen. So in your expert head, you say to yourself: I will play the King, denying the Queen. If partner comes in with the Ace of spades, she will not play back a heart. I explained to her soooooo many times that lowest thing of touching cards in 3rd seat. Having seen the King, she will be sure I don't have the Queen, she will be forced to lead a diamond.

Opener wins with the Ace of hearts and plays King of spades. Partner wins the Ace. Wow, everything is working like you imagined.

Partner thinks and you tremble. She has to, she absolutely has to lead now a diamond. She KNOWS you don't have the heart Queen.

After some 20 seconds, she puts the 8 of hearts on the table.

You almost throw your cards up in the air (you can't, you're on BBO :) ). Please expert, keep your cool. What was the first heart she played? Now it's your turn to think and count and try to remember. Was the first heart she played a small one or a bigger one than the 8? You don't remember??? Expert, expert, you let your emotions get in the way. Pitiful. You're supposed to look at the cards and remember everything. And you didn't.

You play the heart 10 halfheartedly, hoping declarer doesn't ruff. He follows! So don't take any chances now. Ace of diamonds, then club for the 2nd undertrick.

The trouble with beginners is that they don't look. They think they look, but they don't. They have too many things on their mind: the bidding, what you told them about leads, play in first seat, play in second seat, play in third seat, everything. So looking at the cards of other players is too much for them for now.

The trouble with experts is that they sometimes get emotional and forget to look also! :)

Do you count points, or losers?

1st seat, vulnerable, in a team game, you have:



This is the final of the annual Montreal-Toronto friendly match which dates back to 1967. Montreal leads 23-22! The match plays at Irving Litvack's Regal St-Clair in Toronto. Irving has been a warm and perfect host for the Montrealers since Friday night. This is the Sunday morning session.

You play against Canadian champions. This is the 3rd of 4 quarters (24 brds per segment). You are behind by some 40 imps, which is not too big a deficit. If you can win this 3rd segment, you will be within striking distance in the 4th segment.

Board 21



1♠ with only 4 points, some would say? Yes, bridge is a bidder's game and you are behind. So bid first, think later. What do you do over 2♠?

If you were already shaking from fear when you bid 1♠, you will pass in a flash. But then you are not playing bridge and you lack some knowledge about re-evaluation. Maybe you don't read bridge books and magazines. If you did, you would have read Bergen's "Points Schmoints" and also a book called "The losing trick count". I won't enter into details but, when you partner raised you to 2♠, your hand, losing trick count-wise, is worth an opening hand. So what do you do?

First, how many points partner has? Can he have only 12 points?

No. Knowing you have already passed, there is no point in bidding 2♠, even with a fit, if there is no hope for game. So partner must have a good hand, like 14 points, to raise you to 2♠. You might have passed in first seat with 10-11 points. 11 + 14 is 25. But if opener in 3rd seat has only 12 points, 12 + 11 is 23, he would pass 1♠ and raise later if opponents compete.

So you are sure partner has a good hand. Do you still pass 2♠?

If you know the losing trick count and listen to Bergen's preach, you have to bid 4♠! With only 4 points, you still ask? Yes.

The lead is 8 of ♦.



Told you partner had 14 points. You go up Ace, play the ♥ Ace, ruff a ♥, play small spade: King pops up. You make 5, losing one diamond and one club.

You feel good? I hope so. You think this might even be a swing board? Get real. You are not playing against Mom and Pop. No offense intended.

When you compare, you find out you LOSE 8 imps. Your partners doubled them in 4♠! Opponents were also in 4♠. They are champions, I told you. First they bid game and then they try to make the hand. In the long run, bidding game first and then look if the contract is makeable is the winning strategy at imps.

If you had not bid 4♠, you would have lost 13 imps. Will you pass the next time you have 4 points?

By the way, you win the 3rd segment by 11. So you manage to stay in striking distance for the 4th segment.

(WE lost in the end :( ).

Cappalligator

Cappalligator: prehistoric animal of noble extract who, when provoked, feigns to run away, then turns against his aggressor; he has developed this technique to combat his traditional enemies, the Cappellettians.

One school of thought teaches us to double 1NT with a hand of equivalent strength, or stronger.

Practitioners of Cappelletti will then double, penalty, only to hear their partner take it out because they have no points.

Here's a very good question, in my opinion:
"If Cappelletti is for penalty, why does your partner take it out?"

Cappellettians will answer:
"Because he has no points."
"Then the double is not penalty."
"Yes, it is."
"So why doesn't your partner leave it?"
"Because he has no points."
"So it is not penalty, it is optional."
"No, it's penalty."
"So, I say, a bit irritated, if your partner has 20 points and his RHO opens 1nt, 8-10, 10-12, 11-14, 12-14, 14-16, 15-17, 16-18, whatever, he will double and you will take it out because you have no points???"

Discussion with Cappellettians never ends. So I repeat my question:
"Is Cappelletti for penalty or not?"

Like the woman who played Lavinthal in defense, but not always she added (!), Cappelletti, as played by the majority of players, is penalty, but not always.

And if you have:



You won't double 1NT for penalty? You are certain to beat 1NT (unless declarer has 6 club tricks and the Ace of hearts), will you pass because you don't have as many points as the 1NT opener? Here is a good occasion to repeat that bridge is about tricks, not only points.

You open 1NT 15-17 with:



I know, I know, it is not perfect. Your LHO, Cappellettian of good family, doubles. Your partner passes and RHO, also Cappellettian of good standing, starts to think. You thank Heaven, Cappelletti himself and all the saints in paradise. At bridge, when a player starts to think after a Cappelletti double by his partner, it is always a good sign. Cappellettian daughter (they really look like mother and daughter) ends up bidding 2♠, you pass, Cappellettian mother passes and your partner doubles.



Cappellettian daughter asks about the double.
"Cappalligator!" You reply.
"I'm sorry?"

You resist the urge to explain her the noble origins of this extraordinary animal, skipping all the historic part, and go right to the point:
"My partner thinks we will kill you."
"Come again..."
"Penalty!"

You lead the heart King. Here is dummy, cause of Cappellettian mother's double:



Isn't that a Cappelletti of good extraction? Would not all Cappellettians double with this hand?

The heart King wins and you continue heart for dummy's Ace, your partner signaling doubleton.

Declarer then plays small club to her hand (!), you win the 10 and play Heart and Heart, your partner signalling diamond on the 3rd heart, declarer ruffing the 4th heart.

Declarer then plays another club, you win the Ace. You play the diamond Jack for the king and Ace from your partner. She plays back a diamond. Dummy wins the Queen. Declarer continues with the club King, partner ruffs with the spade 9, over ruffed with the Queen!

Declarer plays diamond, you ruff with the spade Jack, under ruffed by partner, and we have now the famous coup, the Alligator Coup, or Cappaligator. The Alligator coup is a small cousin of the Crocodile Coup. This last coup consists of playing a big honour, Ace or King, to overtake partner's stiff honour, to avoid him being end played. Cappaligator, which I have invented, consists of ruffing with the Jack, to allow partner to underruff. Rare, you say ? Very rare. Cappalligator is a very, very rare animal.

You play back a spade, your partner takes the rest, +800.



Poor Cappellettians! Cappaligator's revenge is really terrible, no?

Believe me, if you play Cappelleti penalty, but not always, you will have one day to face the wrath of Cappaligator, and you will repent!

Imagination Is More Important Than Real Life Experience

Playing in a Swiss, you’re just above average after 4 rounds. After lunch, you need at least 2 blitzes if you want to finish honorably. In the 5th match, you meet a good team that you’ve beaten before. Once in a KO final, on the final board of a 4 board tie-break, you led a small heart from Kxx against 6♠. Partner won the ace and came back heart: one down.

So, on the 1st board of the 5th match, after 2 passes, your LHO, vulnerable, opens 1♠ with 8 points. His partner bids 2♥, all pass and we score +200. That should be a good start. That decision by an experienced player to open 1♠ with 10xxxx in spades, really surprises you. It is bad bridge, like trying to be too smart. The rest of the match goes well. You give nothing away on defense. You make a 4♥ with 4 potential losers, the same experienced player switching to a suit you needed to guess and then make 460 in 3NT against soft defense.

On the last board, partner plays 4♠ after a 3♥ preempt on his right.





The lead is the ♥K. RHO overtakes with the Ace, cashes the Queen and switches to a small club. Declarer plays small, LHO wins the Ace and plays back a club, RHO following, and declarer wins the King.

How do you play the spades? The only thing that can beat you is a 4-0 split. Can LHO have all 4 of them? He already showed 7 hearts and 3 clubs. If he has 4 spades, he has 14 cards. Impossible then. So you just have to play Ace of spades. If everyone follows, you claim.

Not taking the bidding and the play of the cards into account (how many times did we repeat that?), my partner played a spade to the King, went down in a cold contract and, instead of winning by 5 or 6, we lost by a similar margin.

That was it for me. I know I am not supposed to do that, but I lost all interest and just felt like quitting.

The rest of the day, I just pushed cards, trying not to make mistakes, but not really caring.

In the next to last match, I find myself in 4♠, vul vs not.



LHO leads the ♥Q.



At least 4 losers. With the overcall, the club King should be placed, that is your only chance. You need to assume that. And you can still have 2 trump losers. If trumps behave and the club king is with LHO, you will make 4♠. But when things seem easy, prepare for the worst. Having lost interest (have I said that before?), I played for a 3-2 trump break and went down. After the match, in the hall, I played and replayed the hand in my head.

I won the ♥K and played a spade to the Queen. LHO played small, RHO won the Ace and played a diamond. I won and played my other diamond. LHO won and played a second heart. I won the Ace. How should I play?

I need 10 tricks. I can count on 2 hearts, 1 diamond and 2 clubs. So I need 5 trump tricks. If trumps break, no problem, but... If trumps are 4-1, RHO should have all 4 trumps, exactly A109x. Will you play a trump to your 8, losing to the 9 or 10 doubleton offside if trumps are 3-2? Do you see a better way?

Wandering in the hall, wishing this damn Swiss would be over, the solution finally dawned on me and I realized I had committed a mortal sin against beauty. And I realized also I robbed myself of the greatest pleasure there is: imagine a hand, place the cards in the opponents' hands, play accordingly and find out, afterwards, you had imagine exactly the distribution.

I write novels and, like the famous author John Irving (The world according to Garp, 1980 something; A widow for one year, 2000 something) says: One must imagine a good story; (…) Personal experience is overrated, but observation is essential.

Imagination is far better at creating believable stories than real life experience. Of course, like John Irving says, if a detail is inspired by real life, it is ok, but it is not necessary.

Bridge is the same: imagination and visualization are the most important tools.

Do you see the pleasure I missed?

Why not ruff out the diamonds and the hearts? While ruffing the hearts, LHO cannot over ruff even if he has the trump 10. With this plan, the spade break is irrelevant. Plan the play exactly. In dummy with the H Ace, you can play a diamond and ruff, 5th trick. Now play a club to the Queen, 6th trick. Now a heart ruffed, 7th trick. Another club to the Ace, 8th trick. The 4th heart from dummy will see you home.

If RHO ruffs, you just discard your losing club and claim.

If he discards, you ruff low and play KJ of spades, making 4.

Isn’t that beautiful?

My play, sloppy and careless, result of my loss of interest, was really a sin against beauty.

A lead is worth... a thousand words!

You have:



And you hear the following auction:



Over 4♠, you toy with the idea of bidding 5 ♥ but you have read The Book (Law of Total Tricks) and you pass in tempo. You try nevertheless to remember what Larry Cohen says about double fits (2♠ shows hearts and clubs) and the following adjustments to the LAW.

While you are busy googling, your partner leads the 6 of hearts.



On the heart 10 from dummy, you win the Ace, declarer playing the ♥7.

How do you continue?

First, you have to think.

• Your partner guarantees at least 5 hearts and 5 clubs, so declarer has 5-6 spades, 1 heart, 1-2 clubs and so... 4-5 diamonds.
• If declarer has 5 spades, 1 heart and 2 clubs, he has 5 diamonds and your partner will ruff the diamond return.

You raise up on your chair, wide awake now, a bit excited, like before a great event. Do the math again: if declarer has 6 spades, 1 heart and 2 clubs, he has only 4 diamonds and partner doesn't ruff the 1rst diamond.

How can you know what he has?

You don't play any card yet.

You could play the Ace of clubs in order to see what will happen, but that would not be enough to set the contract, even if your partner ruffs diamond. After the heart lead, the only entry back to your hand is the club Ace.

To defeat this contract, you have to play diamond for a ruff, asking for a club return and play a second diamond, for one down.

It's so tough! How can you know for sure?

Let's review from the start.



You and your partner lead 3rd from even, low from odd. Your partner led the 6 of hearts, dummy played the 10 and declarer the 7. There, everything is before your eyes... and you don't see anything.

Look again: partner led the 6 of hearts (3rd from even, low from odd), dummy played the 10 and declarer the 7.

You got it? No? Are you blind? Ask yourself: what are partner's hearts ? The King, and then?
You and dummy had AQJ10982 and declarer played the 7.
What's left ? Under the 10, you never look, you say? Why do you play bridge then?

So I will tell you. Partner has K6543.
So? you ask again, blind now by choice or by laziness.
Look again: K6543. With these cards, partner has led the 6, and you normally lead low from an odd number. She led the 6. Why the 6? She led 2nd, and not 5th. Why?

If partner led 2nd and not 5th, she wanted to tell you something. The heart 6 is an abnormal lead, absolutely contrary to your understanding. This strange play form partner is not a mistake, she did not choose the 6 at random. She is trying to tell you something, she is doing all she can to transmit a message within the limits of the bridge language. The heart 6 tells you: Look and look again, think, WAKE UP!

This heart 6 confirms declarer's distribution: 5152. The heart 6 says: Come back diamond, I will ruff. Why diamond? Because, apart from the King, the heart 6 is the highest card possible she could play from this holding to ask for a diamond return. You can now almost hear your partner's voice, applying all the force of her mind, trying to communicate with your mind, repeating in her head: diamond, diamond, play a diamond, play a diamond.

While all this is going on, you didn't look at your partner and she didn't try to influence you by shifting on her seat or by sighing. You are bridge players and you practice active ethics. The heart 6 uses a legal way to tell you something and you finally got the message.

Your hand again:



So you decide to return diamond. Which diamond? The 2, obviously, asking for a club return.

Trembling, you put the diamond 2 on the table. Declarer plays small. Your partner pulls out a card, keeps it hovering over the table, without showing it yet. Is she a sadist?

No, you know her: upon winning a trick, she always does that. You now know that you found the perfect card to play.

Did declarer follow your thoughts? Is he aware of what is going to happen to him?

When the small spade from partner appears on the table, ruffing the diamond, declarer literally jumps on his seat. Your partner comes back a club, you win the Ace and play a second diamond. Declarer will go down 2, partner having also the Ace of spades.

Opening the traveling sheet, poor declarer shakes his head. He is the only one to go down :
"It’s not my fault. You saw this defence. I couldn't do anything, it's not my fault."

That’s bridge. Each and every card has a meaning. You have to look, think, analyse, decipher, in order to see if partner is sending you message. If there is no message, it is still a message, partner is saying: Nothing useful to say, nothing urgent to do, just play normally.

But if the lead is abnormal, really out of your understandings, partner is trying to tell you something. It is your job to look, look and look again, to think, think and think again, to count, count and count again. In every situation at bridge, it is your job to take your time.

And this article makes 1000 words.

La comédie humaine

The French novelist Honoré de Balzac has enchanted many years of my life: just read Le Père Goriot, Illusions perdues, Splendeurs et misères des courtisanes, La Duchesse de Langeais, César Birotteau, Le Cousin Pons, La Cousine Bette, etc., all astonishing works, riveting novels, worth reading over and over again.

I hear you, I hear you: "Balzac? Not for me! Never ending descriptions, pages and pages of details, I would give up after 30 pages..."

You don't know it yet, but you're with me.

If you give up after 30 pages, isn't it like leaving the bridge table while the cards are being shuffled and dealt? Will you quit bridge because shuffling takes too much time? No. Shuffling the cards is the same thing as reading the first 30 pages of a novel by Balzac.

An expert on Balzac once compared all those descriptions and all those minute details to a spring that you slowly rewind. The spring gets tighter and tighter, and when it gets to the maximum tension, you let go and the reaction just hits you, unavoidable result of an inner necessity.

Bridge is the same: once the cards are shuffled and dealt, there is no more luck. Let us be clear: there is no more luck because the distribution of the cards is now fixed, petrified, and unchangeable.

On any given hand, the good player, anxious for order and harmony, respectful of the environment, will look for this primordial order and try to imagine it.

He will build a hypothesis that will let him make his contract without touching anything, without moving things, without making noise, without even scratching the surface of things. Advocate of ecology, humble before the universe, the good player is like the palaeontologist who, upon discovering the smallest hint of a dinosaur, takes out his little brush and sets about to delicately dust off this huge piece. With utter patience, love and persistence, he dusts, brooms, polishes, washes and reveals the original beauty of the entire structure.

On the other hand, the bad player believes that there is luck, not only during shuffling, but also during play. His postulate is then crystal clear: cards move around during the play. And his experience proves it, day after day: his finesses always fail, he often goes down in cold contracts, gets nailed for 800 and sees the opponents pick up his stiff king. "I'm never lucky," you you hear him complaining to his partner.

In fact, the bad player, by playing without thinking, without counting, without imagining, reintroduces luck where there was none no more. He "modifies" the event, like they say in modern science. His absence of plan, his incoherence, smashes the primordial order, destroys the primary structure that had nothing left to do with luck. It is not surprising that, under these circumstances, the Kings, Queens and Aces seem to change places: the bad player creates anarchy.

By the way, most recent bridge softwares imitate this disorder created by a bad play. With these bridge playing programs, if you don't make the right play, the cards really change places, strongly suggesting the existence of an inner order, of a primordial structure, of an original "necessity", unique and unchangeable, that you need to discover.



You are in 5♣, after LHO overcalled 1♥, raised to 2♥ by RHO.

The lead is a small heart.

First question: where are all those hearts? The opponents, with ten of them, were quite tame in the bidding. You call the 10 from dummy, East plays the Jack. What do you know? East probably has AJ of hearts (West did not underlead his Ace).

How many hearts has East? Probably 4. With 5, he would have bid more. West thus has 6 hearts to the King and East has AJxx.

Where is the Ace of diamonds? Again, take out your little brush and continue your dusting: with AJxx in hearts and the Ace of diamond, East would probably have found a cue-bid. Therefore, the Ace of diamond is probably with West.

After ruffing the first heart (did you see far or did you suffer from myopia?), you play a diamond, West plays low and, backing your brooming and dusting, you go up with the King which holds. You play back a diamond and East wins with the Queen.

East thus has AJxx in hearts and Qx in diamonds; West has Kxxxxx in hearts and Axx in diamonds, you know 9 of his cards.

One question immediately jumps out: why did West, with 6 hearts to the King, a raise from his partner and 3 diamonds to the Ace, give up so early? Which weakness has his hand to make him decide to pass?

With a singleton somewhere, he might have bid more. Your little palaeontologist's broom goes back to work and you extrapolate that he probably has 2 spades and 2 clubs. East plays back a heart and you ruff.

You can consider two lines of play: diamonds or spades.

Can you establish dummy's diamonds? First, you have to go to dummy in order to ruff one diamond, and then you have to go back to dummy to enjoy those diamonds; where are your two entries? The first entry could be the 7 of clubs (did you see far or did you suffer from myopia back there? Did you ruff with the 2 and 4 or with the 8 and 9?), placing the Queen with West, and the second entry is the King of clubs (with clubs 2-2).

Let's examine the spades now. Where is the spade King? Probably not with East; that would give him 10 points and, with 4 trumps AJxx, he probably would have made a cue-bid. You are thus practically sure that West has the spade King. And since clubs have to be 2-2 to make your contract (you have to ruff one spade in dummy and then pick up the trumps), West has to be 2632; if you play Ace of spades and another spade, the King will fall and you still will be able to ruff your losing spade in dummy (even if West switches to a trump) and pick up the trumps.

The East-West dinosaurs should therefore look like this:



You play Ace of spades, spade. Like you had visualised, West's doubleton King wins and you make 5C.

At the heart of Le Père Goriot and of La Comédie humaine, we find Vautrin's famous speech (that you did not read because you gave up during the intro) to Rastignac, the young man recently arrived in Paris.

In this piece, Vautrin explains life in society, the lies, the intrigues, the betrayals, the me-myself-and-I rule: "There are no principles, says Vautrin, there are only events; there are no laws, only circumstances."

The superior man is the one who "follows events and circumstances in order to guide them".

The superior bridge player, profoundly political, accepts reality as it is and tries to take advantage of it.

The superior player does not believe in luck, nor in error.

Luck is the science of the bad player, error is the excuse of the incompetent.

The superior player hates mistakes more than he likes luck.

Luck can defeat him, but he believes he will never lose because of a mistake.

In the end, the superior player, emulating gods, plays in order to marvel at his own perfection.

Junkie of the intelligence, the superior player plays to be able to say, like Paul Valéry:

"Day after day, I enjoy the power of my own brain."

A Diamond Is Forever

I used to be a chess player and once qualified for the Canadian Chess Championship by correspondence. I worked my brains out for more than a year, 2 or 3 hours a day, in order to win the qualification. When I finally won, I discovered bridge and I just quit chess, never to play chess again.

What is the difference between chess and bridge?

I don’t want to offend chess players and fans, but I would say chess is a children's game, and I don't mean that in a negative way. It is easy to understand: at chess, you play alone, you have one opponent and you see all the pieces all the time.

At bridge, you have one partner and 2 opponents (some would say that makes 3 opponents, but let's not digress). In the bidding, you see only 13 cards out of 52 and, during the play, you see only 26 cards out of 52.

At chess, there are 32 pieces and you see them all the time. At chess, if neither player makes a mistake, the game will end with a draw. If player A makes a mistake and player B sees it, player A will lose. Sometimes, player A doesn't know he made mistake. He will realise it on the next move, or 5 or 6 moves later.

Bobby Fischer, still in his teens, once playing the American champion, started a combination (a series of forced moves including maybe a sacrifice of one or even 2 pieces in order to mate or to gain a decisive advantage) so deep that the commentators in the other room, not understanding the complexity of the combination, explained to the audience that he was losing the game. At the same time, the American champion, suddenly "seeing" what was happening, resigned.

At bridge, sometimes, a defender doesn't make a mistake, but he still loses, when the declarer submits him to a squeeze for example. Other times, the defender makes a mistake, and the declarer can succeed if he can "see" all the pieces and execute the combination in perfect order.



In the 1st match of the Zonal Teams, opponents were silent and you play 6♣, LHO leading a middle heart.

You play low, RHO wins the Jack and plays back a club. Oops!!

Maybe he should have played back a diamond but you have bid diamonds at some point, and maybe that deterred him from playing that suit. Now if spades break 4-3, you will make 12 tricks, but you have to see deeper in the hand.

You win the club and play 3 more clubs, LHO pitching a heart on the 4th club. You play a spade to the Ace, then the King (on which you pitch a diamond), RHO following with the 9 and the Jack. You then play a small spade (the mistake is to play a third top spade, effectively squeezing yourself), RHO pitches a heart, and you ruff.

Now the position is:



Now you play the 9 of clubs. LHO cannot let a spade go, so he pitches a diamond. You pitch the heart Queen from dummy (!!), not a spade, in order to keep the pressure on West; RHO has to keep the hearts, so he pitches a diamond also.

Now we have reached:



Now a heart to the Ace (the real Vienna coup, creating a winner in East's hand and a menace with the heart 10 in declarer's hand), LHO has to keep both spades, so he pitches another diamond. Now we have:



Next you play the spade Queen from dummy, RHO has to keep the heart King, so he pitches a diamond. You pitch the now useless heart, LHO (immaterial now) follows. Finally, at trick 12, the Jack of diamonds to the Ace collects the Queen from East and the King from West, and the 13th trick (your 12th) is the diamond 2.

I don't know what name or names we can give to this sequence of plays, successive or double or compound or criss-cross or any other exotic squeeze name, but I do know one thing: to be able to foresee that kind of play while seeing only 26 cards out of 52, and then to be able to conduct it till the end is the most exhilarating experience, and it is the reason why I quit chess for bridge.

Winning the 13th trick with the diamond 2, with the opponents unable to do anything about it, this is why I will play bridge... forever.

Between the Thumb and the Index

The exercise is routine, and the actions always the same, that lead each time to this recognizable and desired condition: your middle and third fingers placed on top of the plastic case, the thumb slips under the 13 cards captive of their thin sheath, the index puts pressure on the top of the pack, and the index finger and the thumb, in perfect harmony, in two equal and successive tractions, draw the cards of the first board.

The opposable thumb, what a wonder! Has human being been created so they can easily draw cards from boards and play bridge?

At the same time you access this state, desired, anticipated, each time welcomed, this peace, this silence in your soul and your mind, this seriousness similar to that of children playing a game, or adults making love, this gravity before experiencing a deep pleasure.

You hear nothing, a protective bubble surrounds you and protects you from the world and its hype, while you place your 13 cards in colors, alternating red and black (but not necessarily spades, hearts, diamonds, clubs), the highest card on the left and the others down to the right.

You count your points at the same time, quickly, without going into details, and your distribution in the same way.

Once the cards are placed (how many hundreds of thousands of times have you repeated the same gestures for so many years?), you close your cards, then reopen them, deliberately, allowing the same regular intervals between them.

This time, you count your points accurately, make a provisional statement of your losers and take note of your distribution. Then, cards placed in a fan shape, held gently at the base of the fan between the thumb and the index finger of the left hand, you cross your right leg over the left and you wait for the beginning of the auction.

In anticipation, you look around a bit, who is and who is not there, but this panoramic traveling doesn’t distract you. It is one of those rituals immutable, inevitable, these gestures repeated at the beginning of each session, that carry you... elsewhere.

What is this place where you find yourself, because you're really in a place, but not palpable, non-localizable? You can talk to opponents, make jokes, talk with your partner, but you never leave this place, this space outside of time that you find each time you begin a bridge session.

At the beginning of the session, the gods of the bridge send you a 3NT hand, only to see if you are awake. The lead is a small spade. The view of dummy immediately brings a smile to your lips.



You immediately recognize the theme. You score +430 and notice that, played from your side, the contract will surely fail if declarer is not fully awake. You know them, they won’t plan ahead and will probably go down.

A bit later, you again play 3NT



The lead is the 9 of hearts. 7 sure tricks. Where can you find the 2 others?

In spades maybe, or with the diamond finesse. But you don't want to commit yourself too early. When you don’t know how to play a hand, it is sometimes indicated to let the opponents play for you. Here, you just have to cover the 9 of hearts with the Jack, and East will be in.

East wins with the Queen and thinks for a long time. He can't play back a heart nor a diamond nor a spade: he will each time give you a trick. He should then play a club, dummy's weakness. But he surprises you a lot when he plays back a spade! Why not a club?

You duck and dummy's 9 wins the trick. You then play club yourself and East plays the Queen: is she singleton? Maybe that is the reason East didn't play a club at the trick before. You duck that club Queen. East insists at spades and you win in hand.

Something tells you not to play a diamond and you have learned to listen to your instincts when you are in the zone. And your instincts tell you to beware of those diamonds, to avoid this inviting finesse, too easy in fact.

Maybe East had a stiff club Queen? Maybe he has a 4441 hand. You play the club ace to see what will happen: East plays the King. You thank him silently, you cash the club Jack, discarding a diamond from dummy, East doing the same.

The original hands were maybe like this:



And we are now here:



You now play the spade ace, all following. Spades were then 3-3.



You now play a heart to the Ace, all following. On the spade Queen, East pitches a diamond. You discard a club, West doing the same as you. King of hearts and a heart now endplay East, West discarding another club.

The position is now:



East, endplayed for the 3rd and last time, has to play a diamond, giving you 2 tricks in dummy and +430. Looking at the cards, you notice that the diamond king was with East. You were right then to resist the diamond finesse. And this discovery augments your euphoria. If the king had been under AQ, you would have been disappointed, it would have been to easy a play, accessible to all those finesse maniacs.

You pick up your cards, 10 vertical and 3 horizontal, you replace them in their original position and hold them in your right hand, as usual and always in the same manner: thumb towards you, index on the left side of the pack, 4th finger on the right, middle and 3rd finger holding the cards. When you approach your hand from the board, the 4th finger leaves the cards and sticks in air (like an English lady having tea at Harrod's), you put the 3rd finger on the board, the index applies some pressure on the middle of the pack so it is easier to slide the cards in the board. Once the front end of the pack is introduced in the slim casing, the index stays on top of the pack and the thumbs pushes the cards into the casing.

This ritual after, always the same, responds to the ritual before and maintains you in this special state.

You get up from the table, without effort, like if you were elsewhere. In fact, you are elsewhere, you are in this state of grace, this seventh heaven reserved to bridge players: this diamond King offside has justified your line of play and you know this is the reason why you play bridge, for this elation of the mind, this ecstasy of the intelligence, when you have resisted the easy play, when you resisted to laziness, when you have courageously counted, counted and counted.

You don't look at the traveling sheet, it is without interest really. You walk toward the next table, as light as your convention card... that you hold between the thumb and the index.

Never lie, didn't your mother tell you?

Partner opens 1♠ and you have:



What is your bid?

If you play pure Jacoby 2NT, you can't, you don’t have 4 trumps.
If you play 2/1, can you really bid 2♦ on that suit?  Maybe you can, but our style is a good 5-card suit, a source of tricks, not Jxxxx for example.  The only exception over 1♠ would be if the suit was hearts.
As for those who would bid 2♣ just to create force, how can opener re-evaluate his hand or honours in clubs if 2♣ could be artificial?
So we adopted Fred Gitelman's advice, 2NT natural, game forcing, stoppers everywhere outside opener's suit.  Simple, direct, very, very efficient.  If you have a fit in opener's suit, it can be only 3 cards.  So let's see how it works.



Wow, we have a double fit.  What do you do?  Do you give fit in spades or in diamonds?  Didn't you read somewhere that a 4-4 fit is better than 5-3 because, on the 5-3 suit, you will be able to discard losers?  So you decide to give fit in diamonds.   But wait… like in TV ads.
If you give fit in diamonds, partner won't know you have a spade fit.  If you have possibilities for a grand slam and it is you asking for key cards in diamonds, you will learn maybe that partner has AK of spades, but what about the Queen of spades? 
This is where bridge is so exhilarating: thinking, examining possibilities, ways of extracting information from partner, even if you have to lie to her.  So, you think, I have to fit in spades so I can ask for keys in spades, for I will learn, with King ask, if she has the diamond king.  But if I fit in spades and partner goes key card… but wait.  Partner cannot go key card, she has no control in clubs.  So if you bid 3♠, partner will bid 4♠ if she has a minimum.  If she has extras, she will have to bid something else saying: I have a good hand.  But wait, you say.  What if she bids 4♦ over 3♠, to show a diamond control, but no club control?  I say she can't.  We play that over 3♠ GF, 4♦ shows controls in both clubs and diamonds, as 3NT is available to say: Please cue 4♣ if you have a control there.  Simple, no?  Brilliant, I think.

So


Super! Partner has no control in clubs, but she has extras, which means at least a king more than a minimum.  So now all is in place.

Control your heart beat, relax, breathe in, check everything again, count: 5 spade tricks, 1 heart trick, 3 diamond tricks (3-2 break), 2 club tricks, 1 heart ruff in dummy and 1 club ruff in hand = 13.  If trumps don't break, heart finesse will have to work.  You reach out leisurely, take the 7♦ card in your hand and slowly place it on the table.  It is not everyday you bid a grand slam, so savour the moment.  And when is the last time you establish a false trump suit to reach a grand slam in another suit?

After putting the 7♦ card on the table, you look around the room, trying to find a pair that would bid like you did (isn't he so full of himself!).  You can't find one.  Everything worked like magic, but wait…   Partner is thinking (she always does that to me).  She examines her hand.  Every second that passes kills me.  Finally, finally, she puts the pass card on the table and you come back to life.  Everything broke nicely,  +2140.


But wait ‼!  The heart finesse was on, so every card pusher could bid and make 7♠.

Don't lie, my mother told me, or you will get punished.

Timeo Danaos et dona ferentesI fear the Greeks bearing gifts

If you are like me, boarding school has left you with memories you cannot get rid of: bad meals (all you can eat style), boring lessons, spiritual counsellor (damn sex!). Latin and Greek were mandatory and we have learned there sentences that have stayed with us all those years.

Delenda quoque Cartago, repeated Catton the Ancient (We must destroy Cartago).
Arma virumque cano… sang Virgil. Upon learning that Aeneas was leaving her, Dido tore up her clothes (quick, to the spiritual counsellor).
Quo usque tandem abutere, Catilina, patientia nostra … shouted Cicero in the Senate. (Till when will you abuse of our patience, Catilina…)

Useless, all this culture? Not a bit. Every bridge player has repeated to his partner, who never listens: Delendo Quoque dummy (We must destroy the dummy). When declarer cashes 7 diamonds tricks in no trump, haven't you never murmured: Till when will you abuse of our patience?

We don't have a spiritual counsellor anymore (purity being a constant problem, we have chosen impurity) and, growing up, we have learned that, in all those classical stories just as in our modern life, everybody sleeps with everybody and that, in certain situations, if you rely heavily on your principles, they will finally cave in and real life can then begin.

In 1st seat you open 1♦:



At bridge, life begins at 4♠. What is happening? You had planned, after your partner’s probable response of 1♥, to jump to 2NT.

But those Visigoths, in the Radio Shack armour, are already at the top of the fortress. All your plans blow up in smoke, what can you do?

If you believe those hyper-aggressive Vandals, LHO should have at least AQJxxx in clubs and RHO, at least 7 or 8 hearts to the King. Your partner is left with KQ of spades and KQ of diamonds for her bid of 2♠ (promising at least 10 points).

The more you think, the more you feel, behind you, Achilles steaming with impatience. Him and Ulysses always fight when they have to establish a plan of action. In fact, Achilles always comes up with the same plan:

"Charge!!!"

In your situation, the Achilles approach seems to be best and you jump to 6NT. Your audacity surprises the Visigoths.

Looking at them, you see they received a scientific schooling: full of trigonometry, of canapés and asking-bids, they obviously never heard of Ulysses and Achilles. Perplexed, they pick their nose, study their hand and comment in their primitive language (sounds like American slang).

During all of this, your LHO, the index deep in his nose, examines his hand, undecided about what to lead. Finally, with all the sophistication he can offer, he "throws" the ♦8 on the table, and puts his index back where it was.

Apparently unfinished business, you reflect silently.



Dummy surprises you, your partner not having what her bid promised. And no heart finesse possible either. Ouch! But it could be worse, as my wife always says, you could be at work!

You understand suddenly LHO's problem: he was end played at trick one. The lead is therefore favourable. Dummy’s Jack forces the Queen from RHO and you win with the ace.

You count your tricks: 5 diamonds, 1 heart, and 5 spades if you find the queen. 11 tricks only.

If you cash 10 tricks (after having found the spade queen), LHO will have to keep AQ of clubs and at least 1 heart to avoid being thrown in and forced to lead a heart into your AQ.

At trick 11, if LHO has played well and kept 1 heart and AQ of clubs, you will have to play Ace of heart and a heart, down one… unless LHO's last heart is the king. Eureka! You shout in your mind...

Why didn’t he lead a heart, his partner's suit? Because he has the King. A squeeze is therefore your only option.

As you have to play spades before diamonds in order to be in your hand at trick 10, you play the spade Ace from your hand, small from LHO, small from dummy, heart 2 from RHO! Wow! You stop to think. Suddenly, RHO expectorates a "Sorry!" and spits a spade on the table.

With the exposed card, the impossible heart finesse becomes possible, 12 tricks glow. The Huns capitulates, Achilles blows his Oliphant (anachronism that will go unnoticed by all scientists), lamenting: What cowards, not even a fight; an exposed card, how pusillanimous.

Cassandra shivers in her diaphanous dress and utters the song of all oppressed people: Timeo Gringos and dona ferentes (I fear the Americans, especially when they offer gifts). As you all know (well, some of you), Cassandra, princess of Troy, was doomed to always tell the truth, yet never to be believed.

What would you have done?

Do you take advantage of the exposed card to play the queen and take the impossible heart finesse?

Or do you stick with your plan of squeezing LHO?

Do you ignore this Greek gift in order to play the hand as it has to be played, for the beauty of it?

In your head, all those great sentences that you learned in your youth, that sing heroism, courage, greatness of heart, and the beauty of the squeeze, soon drown in the ocean of amoral aphorisms that the Gringos have spread everywhere:

• There is nothing below first place;
• Show me a good loser, and I will show you a loser;
• Winning is not everything, it is the only thing;
• Take the money and run!

Is an elegant defeat worth more than a vulgar success?

The opportunistic ethics of modern barbarians finally wins the battle over the noble heroes of yesterday and you play the Queen of hearts. LHO wins the king and cashes the Ace of clubs, down one.



"O Tempora, O Mores … " said, I believe, Cicero, probably just before drinking the hemlock.

Philosophy in the boudoir

Why did human beings invent bridge?

Probably to prolong sexual pleasure. Oops! What am I saying?

Well, some will say: What a twisted mind!

How can we talk sex about bridge? It seems obvious to me.

As sexuality is limited in time, the human being was forced to create other games that would be as much fun as sex, but last longer. Hence the invention of bridge. QED.

When a sex session with your spouse lasts an hour or two (I know, I know, I embellish, but I am a man after all), it is a top (you see, we are not far from bridge).

At bridge, this pleasure with your spouse (!) lasts 3 hours or more, with several tops and several fiascoes, this last word used by French author Stendhal to describe precisely a sexual failure. You see again that sex and bridge are not far apart.

Between two or three tops per week in bed (I know, I know I exaggerate yet again), and 4-5 tops or more per night at the bridge club, there is no dilemma: quick, let's go to the bridge club! Especially when you take the pragmatic approach: tops in bed are exhausting, while tops in bridge -- you often just sit there and they fall from the sky!

Others tops, however, occur because they are conjured, carefully planned, they are created from scratch by the mere power of your mind. During such moments, one can have a very erotic experience!

LHO opens 1NT 15-17. Your hand:



Your partner passes, responder also passed and you decide to pass as well, your flat distribution is not appropriate for balancing. Your partner leads the 5 of hearts (3rd/5th).



This beginning does not look very exciting.

Declarer calls for small in dummy, you play the ♥7 and declarer wins the 8.

Declarer plays the ♠Q, partner plays the 8 (reverse count, showing three cards), dummy plays small, and so do you.

Declarer then plays the ♠J, ♠7 from partner, small in dummy.

Like the desire that sometimes arouses without warning, instinctively, you duck again, without haste or hesitation.

This flirt with danger excites you, especially as it is good bridge: you duck to have a chance to beat the contract (you are playing teams), to give declarer a chance to go wrong.

Indeed, South plays a third spade, your partner follows and declarer is at the crossroads: to play the Ace or not to play the Ace, as Hamlet would say? Two seconds pass, 6, 10, 15, 30 seconds, declarer hesitates, sniffing the air like an animal, trying to sense the danger.

The animal would not go wrong, but a human being cannot reasonably believe that you have stiffed your King of spades.

All your senses are awake. Your heart is pounding. You relive your first love at first sight. What intense pleasure! South finally calls for the 10 in dummy and you win your stiff King. First plateau of pleasure!

You enjoy this first success and take a deep breath.

How can you now lead this to the ultimate point, like the surrealists would say? "Courage is something that needs to be organized," wrote Malraux. Like a top and sexual pleasure in bridge, or vice versa, as you like!

Now the King of clubs?... NO!

Keep your libido under control… and your nerves! Exit in diamonds, hoping that your partner has the Jack. Declarer plays the Ace (2 from partner, she likes), followed by the King.

Seeing the endplay coming (the fiasco), you throw your Queen under the King (are we not ready sometimes to drop everything for a flirt?)

South plays a 3rd diamond, Jack from your partner, who also cashes the ♦8, everybody discarding a club.

The position is now:



Everything is ready, ecstasy is approaching.

Your partner holds your destiny in her hands.

All she needs now is J10 of hearts (is it not fortunate that the heart is at the heart of this flirt?)

You are not asking for much, only J10 of hearts. You throw her a quick glance and her face, her allure, her posture, everything tells you she will play the Jack of hearts.

After the 8 of Diamonds, she puts the Jack of hearts on the table!

You cannot believe your eyes, you have succeeded.

Your heart skips a beat, you almost faint, you soar in the sky: the top is there, within easy reach.

You're ready to swear loyalty to her until the end of your days, or hers, or at least until the end of the hand.

Your bold flirt, brilliant and risky, has created tricks that were non-existent for the defense.

You already see the +50 that you will proudly show your partners (1 spade, 2 hearts, 2 diamonds and 2 clubs). Added to their +90 (you doubt that your opponents can play as well as you!), you will earn 5 beautiful Imps created by a flirt, a daring trap set for declarer.

While you float on cloud nine, inebriated by the fragrance of this intellectual orgasm, dreaming of your future glory (this hand will surely make the Bulletin), South ducks in dummy!? What's happening ? This play harshly brings you back to earth.

Forced to fall from your cloud, you evaluate the situation. What can you do?

The more you think about it, the more you see that there's nothing to do.

South's latest coup, so simple, cancels your two brilliant shots.

Upset, disenchanted, frustrated, you play a small heart on your partner's Jack. South wins the Ace and endplays you in hearts! It's over! South will write +90 instead of -50.

Very impressed by this beautiful play, you take a look at declarer and you notice for the first time that it is a woman.

Trying to make eye contact to compliment her on the quality of her game, you only see at first her magnificent rasta-style chestnut hair. Sensing your eyes on her, she turns her head towards you, her emerald eyes plunge deep into your soul (and even a little further) and she says:

"In these troubled times, isn't bridge the safest form of sex?"

Elementary, my dear Watson!

Dr. Watson was kibitzing his old friend Sherlock Holmes, who was playing a little rubber at their club in London. Watson didn't play bridge. Well, he did play but never with Holmes. In fact, nobody wanted to sit at Holmes's table. Everybody thought he could see through the cards: he always took winning finesses, always found a missing Queen and always made the right switch. Furthermore, Holmes had a nasty tongue that frightened all his partners. At dummy's sight, he would take out his magnifying glass, lean over the table, examining carefully his partner's cards and would almost always say: "My dear friend, even with a magnifying glass, I can't find what you promised me in the bidding."

The only players willing to play with Holmes were Jack the Ripper, Dr. Moriarty and Inspector Lestrade of Scotland Yard. Jack and Moriarty played together, naturally, and the inspector teamed with Holmes, the good against the bad, like when we were kids.

Left of Holmes sat Jack the Ripper. Holmes, 4th seat, opened his hand:



Jack led a heart.



When dummy hit, Holmes jumped on his chair, took out his magnifying glass, leaned slowly over the table and started to examine the cards. He hovered like a helicopter, going from the spades to the hearts, suddenly diving towards those two little clubs. He would then look at the inspector through his magnifying glass. The inspector, not a bit intimidated, opposed a defying grin that only all-powerful government officials can display.

At first glance, Watson could count 6 losers: 2 spades, 2 diamonds and 2 clubs. He was prepared to listen to the chapter of insults that Holmes generally addressed to his partners who grossly misbid. But his cell phone rang. He had to go away to answer and, by the time he returned, the hand was over. He bent down to check the score sheet and saw 100 in Holmes's column. Holmes had made 11 tricks! Holmes sensed his old friend's amazement, turned to him and offered his most mischievous smile.

After the game, walking back to his flat on Baker Street, Holmes explained the hand.
"So, this hand, Holmes, how did you make 11 tricks?" asked Watson. "3 winning finesses, I imagine?"

Watson knew only finesses in bridge. That is the reason why Holmes would not play with him.

"No, said Holmes. I would say maybe one, if finesse means 50% chance of winning. Once the 1st finesse won, the rest was forced."
"Can you elaborate?"

"Heart lead," reminded Holmes. "The bidding has revealed that my friend Jack has 6 spades. Does he have a singleton heart? Not likely. He has 3 or 4. One cannot accuse Jack of being timid in the bidding either. With seven spades, I know him, he would have rebid 3. On dummy's small heart, Moriarty played the Queen and I won with the Ace. The heart Jack was then most probably on my left. To find the club king, I have to locate the Ace of spades first. It is the only play where I need to be lucky, 50%, to be exact. So I played a spade. Jack jumped with his Ace and played back a spade, Moriarty following with the Queen and the Jack. So, for his opening bid, Jack has 6 spades to the Ace, probably the heart Jack, the King of diamonds (with the Jack maybe) and the King of clubs. So, after the King of spades, I played a club to my Ace, picking up Jack's stiff King."
"Bravo, Holmes!"
"Elementary, my dear Watson!"
"So, a beer at the Piccadilly Circus, Holmes?"
"I have not finished, Watson. So far, I have only 10 tricks. How did I make 11?"
"One of them revoked?"
"I played the 9 of hearts, ducked in dummy. Moriarty won the 10 and played a club. I won in dummy with the 7. Everything is in place now for a trump coup."
"Donald Trump? Where, Holmes??"
"Not Donald Trump, Watson, a Trump Coup. This is the position:



King of hearts, Moriarty follows, I pitch a diamond and the Jack falls on my left. The 8 of hearts - which is big, Moriarty follows and I ruff..."
"Why ruff a winner? Have you smoked again?"
"No, Watson. To succeed, I have to reduce my trumps to the same number as Moriarty. In fact, here we have a Grand Trump Coup because I ruff a winning card in order to reduce my trump holding. So small diamond to the Queen."
"Ah ha! A finesse !!"
"No, not a finesse. A certainty. In dummy with the diamond Queen, I play spade, Moriarty discards and I ruff again."
"Again ??"



"Small diamond to the Ace and diamond. Moriarty is finished. That's what we call a Grand Trump Coup. With this coup, you pick up one of opponent's trumps without playing trump. It is a beautiful coup, rare enough to talk about it when it arrives."

At the corner of Oxford Street, they noticed a crowd near Selfridges, one of the biggest department store of London. They rushed over, sensing something had happened. The police, recognizing Holmes, let them through. On the sidewalk was lying Dr. Moriarty, dead, his chest ripped opened.

"What happened?" asked Holmes.
"Jack the Ripper left his card," he heard.
"You can say that again," mumbled Holmes.

On the corpse they found a playing card covered in blood.

"What card is it, Holmes?" asked Dr. Watson.
"Elementary, my dear Watson! It is the card Moriarty had to play to defeat 5 Clubs."

Phryne

Phryne before the Areopagus by Jean-Léon Gérôme, c. 1861
Phryne, Greek courtesan from the 4th century BC, mistress of master sculptor Praxiteles, was so beautiful that she served as a model when Praxiteles decided to give shape and face to the goddess Aphrodite.

Accused of impiety, Phryne appeared before the Heliasts, Athenian judges who sat at sunrise (the Greek word Helios means sun).

Her lawyer defended her to the best of his capacity, but failed to really convince the judges of her innocence.

Running out of arguments, he decided to undress the beautiful courtesan. The Heliasts, dazzled by her amazing beauty, immediately declared her innocent, as a woman of such beauty could only be a prophetess of Aphrodite and she must have been telling the truth.

Thus, truth is always beautiful, and beauty is always true.



You play 4♥, with opponents silent in the auction, and LHO leads the Queen of diamonds.

Count your losers: 1 spade, 1 heart, 1 diamond and 1 or 2 clubs. 5 losers, that’s a lot.

You probably can ruff a club in dummy, which eliminates a loser, but you still have to find the Queen of hearts.

After ruffing a club in dummy, you need to find the heart Queen. So with this line of play, you make 1 spade, 5 hearts (subject to finding the Queen), 2 diamonds, 1 club and 1 club ruffed: 10 tricks.

But this line doesn’t appeal to you, it lacks flexibility, it is not natural, it is complicated.

Moreover, after playing Ace of clubs and a club, opponents will return a diamond, establishing a trick in that suit.

You win the second diamond, ruff a club and then what? Spade to your Queen? Opponents take their king and cash their diamond trick and you still have to find the Queen of hearts. No, this line is not elegant. There must be something simpler, more natural, more... beautiful.

While you think, opponents waiting patiently, Phryne walks in your mind: to convince the judges, she just unveiled her charm and beauty.

You cannot stop thinking that the answer to your problem lies in these simple words: beauty seduces because it is the truth, and truth dazzles with its beauty. The judges, before the perfect curves of divine Phryne, could only agree: she was so beautiful that she could only tell the truth.

Perfect forms are perfectly smooth, without rough edges: curves, bends, harmony, music, perfect, eurhythmy. Your mind plays with these thoughts: just remove the veils and the truth will appear, naked, indisputable.

You count again but this time, your winners: 1 spade, 4 hearts, 2 diamonds and 1 club: 8 winners.

If the King of Spades is on your right, you will make your Queen, 9 tricks.

It means going to dummy to play a spade to your Queen. Then you must return to dummy a second time to cash the Ace (after unblocking the Queen in your hand).

Suddenly, your heart races, and the emotion you feel convinces you that you have finally seen the truth.

And this line is so beautiful, so smooth, it appeals to you immediately. You are certain this is the right course of play, the only one, the true one.

You play a small heart to dummy, LHO plays small, you insert the 10, it wins! Then, as in a dream, small spade to your hand.

RHO rises with the King and returns a diamond. You win your King, unblock the Queen of Spades and play the Jack of hearts.

LHO covers, dummy wins as RHO provides the 9. You then have the opportunity, what am I saying?, the luxury of playing a small spade that you ruff with the King of hearts.

Next you play a small heart to the 8 in dummy, cash your 2 good spades and claim 11 tricks !

What beauty, what incredible magic. The four hands:



You see that your first line of play (club ruff) would not work, getting overruffed by RHO. Even if you ruff with the 10, you go down.

Often, at the bridge, we refuse to see, to submit ourselves to the evidence, we choose to be blind and deaf.

Often, the cards tell us how to play, how to handle them: we just have to watch and listen.

Do cards have an inherent beauty, an underlying harmony, that we have to discover and follow, like a piece by Mozart or Bach?

Complicated lines of play resemble the convoluted language of lawyers, tedious, tortuous, where sentences end up not saying anything.

What is complicated is never beautiful. The Heliastes understood all that.

They refused all the lawyer’s quibbling which obscured the truth. When Phryne showed herself in all her splendour, they had to accept the evidence of the truth.

At bridge, cards always tell the truth. What about lawyers? Well...

The Apple - Law and Principle

The apple tree has always attracted human kind: Adam and Eve, Newton and... Eric Kokish.  What?  Yes, Eric has once written that if you shake an apple tree (well, a bridge tree?!), ten good dummy players will fall, but maybe only one good bidder.
 
Is the one good bidder the same apple that Newton received on his nose (ok, maybe it fell at his feet)?

The pain Newton felt prompted him to invent the Law of Gravity.  The pain of going down one has also prompted Matthew Granovetter to formulate the Law of Granovetter, or should we say the Law of Gravitynovetter: "Don’t bid a grand slam if you cannot count 13 tricks".
 
Well, after Newton came Albert Einstein who said that "Imagination is more important than knowledge" and that the fast ball Newton saw falling from the tree is actually a curve ball.
 
Then, in 1990, after winning a world championship in Geneva, Gabriel Chagas who often throws curve balls has invented the Chagas Principle: "If you're lucky or good on the first board, things are probably going to go your way".

So, all this gibberish means that if you think in straight lines, you are applying the Law of Gravitynovetter.
 
And if you think in curves, if you let your imagination sometimes supersede your knowledge, you are following the Chagas Principle.
 
In the second session of a Calcutta, you pick up your first hand:



Partner opens 1♣, you bid 1♥.  Partner jumps to 3NT, showing long solid clubs.  This is the time to imagine: if partner has Qx or even Jx in hearts, you have a chance in 6♥.  You have no means to know, you must imagine.
 
You were average in the afternoon, tonight you must make it happen.
 
The longer you think, the less you know and the more you find that you have to plunge.  You bid 6♥.


 
Dummy is one card short of your imagination but then again, dummies always lack imagination.  You take the ♦K lead with your Ace, go to dummy  with a ♠, play AK of ♣ to pitch a ♦  and a ♠.  The moment has come:  Q of trumps... holds.  You ruff a ♦ and, imagining Jx somewhere, you play K of trumps... for the J and Ace: +1430 (12 IMPS).
 
In the 3rd round, the opponents, after pre-empts (curve balls) from your part, play 6♠ and 4♠, go down in both contracts and you gain 17 IMPS.  You feel you can't lose now.
 
In the fifth round, white against red, you and your partner throw a rising fast ball, one can't always throw curve balls, can one?


 
Partner plays AK of ♥ and ♥.  Declarer pulls trumps and plays Q of ♣.  You cover.  She takes the Ace and plays... the J from her hand?!  A mean sinker.  One down: + 13 IMPS.
 
Is this possible?
 
In the 6th round, the opponents climb up to 5♣ vul, doubled.  Declarer can escape for - 200, but makes also a mistake and you reap +500, 6 IMPS.
 
After 7 rounds, you are + 61 IMPS.  Halfway to go.
 
In the 8th round, you pick up:


 
The bidding:


 
4♠ is KCB and 5♠ asks for specific king(s);  5NT shows the K of ♠ and does not deny another king; 6♣ asks specifically for the king of clubs and 6♥ denies it.  What do you do?  Do you know if partner has the Q of ♠ or the Q of ♦?  No.
 
You are at the crossroads: do you follow the Law of Gravitynovetter?
With this hand, you know you can count only 12 tricks.  Or should you apply the Chagas Principle?  Should you bid 7NT, even if partner has denied the king of ♣?  Should you imagine 13 tricks even if you cannot count 13 tricks?  Should you go against the Law of Gravitynovetter?
 
Yes, and you cannot miss:  from board one, luck was with you.
 
Everything you have done turned out right, opponents have given you tons of IMPS, you're riding a high wave of success.
 
In these special conditions, the Chagas Principle overrules the Law of Gravitynovetter, don't go against the good vibrations, remember the first board, you CANNOT fail, think in curves, not in straight lines,
 
Imagination is more important than knowledge, BID 7NT!!!


 
You win 10 IMPS and finish second overall, +84 IMPS.
 
In ordinary conditions, follow the law of Gravitynovetter:  Do not bid a grand slam if you cannot count 13 tricks.  A fast ball on the nose is a lot of pain.
 
In exceptional situations, forget Newton and follow the Chagas Principle, think in curves, imagine.
 
You cannot fail.

Dear Computer

Dear computer,

We have been seeing each other for more than 30 years now.  I must say that these 30 years have been quite a ride.  Playing in local clubs where nobody likes you, I had to take your side all the time. I have to confess I sometimes was tempted to side with the players who use the phrase you hate so much: "those hands", like that woman or that guy!  A phrase that infuriates you, I know.

In 30 years, you have never compromised, which is admirable, I have to admit.  True to yourself, you turned a deaf ear to all those who complained about your unusual shapes, unnatural distributions and unpredictable breaks.

What is unusual about a bridge hand? was and is your only and repeated defence.  The hands are dealt and distributed randomly, that is all.  Does Roger, who blames me all the time, think I get up at 3 in the morning to fix the hands in order to trick him personally?  I don’t even know Roger!  How would I want to mislead Susan (another one who hates me to death) personally?

But they won't listen to you, computer.  They just hate you, it is... natural for them to hate you because you are not, well... natural.

I have been down in many contracts myself, even if I have known you all those years.  I sometimes mutter some bad words, like when the Queen is doubleton offside.  I kick myself cause I know it is doubleton offside (30 years, remember...).  If only I had played AK, I would have made that slam.  So I found myself in 6♠ last week, dealt by you, my dear.

All the way during the bidding sequence, I was thinking: "In this club, we will be the only one in slam.  If I go down, we are doomed to a cold zero.  Probably the only problem will be the trump suit, trumps will possibly break 4-1."

Sorry, computer, don’t take it personally (oops!).  I repeat, 30 years of marriage (sort of ) have taught me a thing or two.  No, dear, I am not accusing you now of dealing me "those hands", but you must admit, they happen.  Not more than the probabilities, you say?  Don’t shout, dear.  Yes, dear, just probabilities.



I got a friendly diamond lead, won the Jack with the Queen in hand.  Immediately, I tossed the King of trumps on the table.  Small, small, Jack.

"Well... dear..." I started to murmur.
"I am not listening!" teeths gritting.  "Just play bridge."

I then played the trump 7, small, small, discard.  6♠ making 7, and a top board.

I must say, dear, making that slam was a consolation for all the times I went down in a slam with a 10-card trump suit, with trumps breaking 3-0.  Or when I was in 6♣, we were the only ones there, and trumps split 5-0 dealt by you!  Or when we were in 6♦ with an 8 card fit topped with AKQ (we could also have played in clubs, we had the same combination), but each minor broke 4-1; all we had to do, stated the sheet (you, dear !) was to play instead in 6♥ with trumps AKJxxx facing stiff Queen.

Shall I continue?  You are not listening, I know.  You say I am an old and unfaithful grump?

"Yes you are.  You say we have been friends all those years, that you took my side."
"Yes I did."
"I know you talk behind my back..."
"Who said that..."
"Never mind.  I know what I know.  You think I have no heart, no feelings, no..."
"Don’t cry, dear."
"I am not crying, you idiot.  Have you ever seen a computer cry?"

Karma and Dharma (or How to prevent your stupid partner from making a mistake)

Karma is a trendy word.
 
Many use it as an excuse: It’s my karma, they say, to explain that destiny has decided for them, that they can't do anything, that they are always unlucky.  If everything was written beforehand, people with the same karma should arrive at the same result, which is not the case.
 
Some, born with a silver spoon in their mouth, waste their lives, while others, born with absolutely nothing, achieve astonishing success.  Why is that?
 
Well, it is because we forgot dharma.  Karma is maybe what we receive when we are born, but dharma is what we do with it.  Thus man is always free, whatever his debut in life.
 
The bridge player also is free, whatever the cards he receives.
 
You have:



Your partner opens 1♥



You lead the 8 of hearts.



Declarer plays small in dummy, partner wins the Queen, plays the Ace and returns a heart.  You ruff and play a club: Queen from partner, Ace from declarer, who then plays AK of spades, 10 tricks.  You get almost a bottom and start the usual whining:
 
"It’s our karma.  How can I know you have the Ace of diamonds and not the Ace of clubs?"
 
Examining the score sheet, you find all sorts of results, typical of a local club game.

Contract	Score
4♠ =	- 420
4♠-1	+ 50
3♠-1	+ 50
3♠-2	+ 100
2♠ =	- 170 (you)
etc.

A "normal"’ score sheet in your club.  How is this possible?
 
All the players have the same cards, no?  How can they make 10 tricks at one table and 7 at the next?  Is Karma all mixed up?  NO. 
 
Some players invoke karma to explain their failure, others use dharma.  Let’s have a closer look.



8 of heart lead, small, Queen, small; then Ace, small, small, small.
 
Now what card must partner play to suggest a diamond return? 
 
A big heart obviously, to tell you to play back the higher suit, diamonds.  So you ruff and play a diamond to partner’s Ace who returns a 4th heart.  Declarer discards his losing diamond, you ruff, end of defense, 2 making.  How can 2 go down?  You can’t see it.
 
On the last round, you are bye and you decide to kibitz the best pair of the club.  You’re lucky: they are playing that famous 2 board.  Same bidding, same lead.
 
But, on the big heart return from his partner, signaling diamonds, the player with your cards, after ruffing, makes a play that astonishes you: he plays the King of diamonds.  His partner then makes another play that stuns you even more: he takes the King with his Ace, then cashes the Queen.
 
Defenders now have 5 tricks: 2 hearts, 2 diamonds and 1 spade.  After the diamond Queen, the 4th heart is now played.  What is he doing?  Is he really giving a ruff/sluff?
 
Declarer, witnessing all this marvelous play, cannot help being amazed: he knows very well he will get a zero, but he can only admire the beauty of this sequence of play, this dazzling and infallible logic.  He ruffs with the 10, knowing very well it is useless.  West over ruffs with the Queen, 2 down one.
 
This result has nothing to do with luck or bad luck.  The only bad luck for declarer was to play this board against those players.  The cards are the same for everybody (karma) and everyone has the possibility to play them for the best result (dharma).  Wanting to learn, you ask explanations.  You should always ask good players, they will usually answer.  If you don’t ask, they will not tell you.
 
"Why the king of diamonds?"
"Since my partner has signaled diamonds, I play the King so he doesn’t make a mistake, to force him to cash the Ace at the second diamond play. That way, declarer cannot discard his losing diamond on the 4th heart."
"And why did you take the King with the Ace?"
"To prevent my partner from making a mistake.  As I have AQJ10, it is easy for me to take the King and play the Ace.  If I play the 10, who knows what can happen?"
"And why a 4th heart, and not a club?"
"My partner passed on 1. With the King of diamonds and Ace or King of clubs, he would have made a negative double.  So partner doesn’t have a club honour.  Declarer has redoubled to show a good hand, so he has AK of clubs.  My club Queen is dead.  The only hope then is that partner has the spade Queen.  It is not certain, obviously, but it is the only chance.  If it works, good for us; if it doesn’t work, we couldn’t beat 2."
"Thank you very much, it is very clear.  So, if I understand well, playing defense is mainly preventing partner form making a mistake.  I have to think for him?"
"Yes.  You know Murphy’s Law: if something can go wrong, it will.  If partner has the chance to make a mistake, I must prevent him from doing so."
 
The next time you play bridge, instead of looking around fearing your bad karma, think of preventing your partner from making a mistake.
 
Think about karma and dharma.  When you look at your hand, you see your karma.  You can leave it as is, and then complain.  Or you can use your dharma: play your cards the best way you can.
 
Good players don’t care about karma. They believe only in dharma.